What ho! and all that. I have to tell you that I have been selected by Miss Honoria Plum of Plumtopia as runner-up in her recent competition to win a copy of ‘Highballs for Breakfast‘. Miss Plum writes :
“The Cheapest White on the List sat alone at a corner table, solemnly pawing an Anglers’ Rest bar menu.
‘What’s the matter with him? asked The Dubonnet Queen of Ealing Common.
‘The price of Pinot Grigio has gone up’ said a Totally Roasted, discreetly. ‘He’s had to switch to a Chardonnay from South Eastern Australia.”
‘But Australian wine is supposed to be quite good,’ replied The Dubonnet Queen.
‘Not this one,’ said The Cheapest White on the List.
‘I’ve got a nephew in Australia,’ said a Whiskey Mac. ‘Moved to Perth last year. Loves it apparently.’
‘Who hasn’t got a nephew in Australia? That’s what I’d like to know,’ said an Oatmeal Stout.
The Cheapest White on the List nodded. ‘That’s right! Why, if I threw this drink out of the window, I’m practically guaranteed to hit at least three people with nephews in Australia– probably more.’
‘I wish you would,’ said a Diet Shasta Orange and 150 Proof Grain Alcohol, who happened to work in personal injury claims.
‘I’ll bet Mr. Mulliner has nephews all over Australia,’ said the said the Whiskey Mac.
‘And nieces,’ said a Sparkling Water.
The assembled drinkers looked expectantly at Mr Mulliner. He beamed at them in reply.
‘Well, as it happens….’
Scroll through the 134 Comments to find the alter ego awarded to Milady back in the Dark Ages of the 1970s. These days I don’t touch the stuff. But the name has stuck amongst a small, elite band of friends. I think it was, at one time, the preferred snifter of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth The Queen Mother. Correct me if I’m wrong.
Wodehousian Note :
My Australian friend, Lyn (I Prefer Reading), straightaway recognised the source of my strapline “There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature” (Strychnine in the Soup).
Yuletide Felicitations to you all (in case I don’t reappear before next weekend)